Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Why do Canadian's cross the border?

To get to the other side.  
Does anyone know why countless Canadians save up their pennies and then come to the United States of America?  Does socialized medicine ring a bell?
Yeah, it's no good up there and it would be no good down here.  When a 57 year old who needs a hip joint cleaned up (due to arthritic bony spicules causing severe chronic pain) in the US what happens?  He gets it done and expeditiously at that!  If his insurance doesn't pay for it, he can still get it done without traveling to another country.  If a Canadian needs this done after paying exorbitant taxes all his life, they will say, "Nope, sorry, your too old.  You only have a few years of life anyway, and we can use that money better on someone else.  So here, take some Ibuprofen for the rest of your life".  Crazy scenario?  Yes, but it actually happened to a 57 year old Canadian who saved up his dollars, came to the US, and had this procedure done.  
So, what boarder are we going to cross when socialized medicine hits?  

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

When to stop having children...

Whoa!  Here is a definite gray zone where I'll probably get put into my place.  A very circumstantial area of opinion for sure.  So, to go about answering the question with my male opinion, I'll first have to explain the circumstance.
First of all, for those with many kids...
I see a ton of welfare patients as a resident.  I get many people who are very demanding people, wanting things done for them on the governments tab (aka: your and my tax tab).  That being said, more than 50% (a guestimate) of the people who have no intent on bettering themselves or improving their circumstances, still have cell phones, cable TV, and a pack a day cigaret habit to quench... and then stop by McDonald's two times on their drive into our office.  If you don't see the problem I'm painting here, then STOP reading.  You are hopeless.  One of these family types came into the ER the other night.  I had just examined the hairy, tatoo laden, smelly man in the ER for an ENT related issue.  I find out from his toothless "fiance" of three years, that they have 7 children total after putting each other's addition from a previous marriage together.  They were very proud of this fact.  I was about as happy for their children as I was for the Octo-mom's children.  
When is it time to stop?  Here are some of my criteria...
Cannot afford to give them opportunity.
Opportunity can be and mean many different things.  For example, 0pportunity to have financial opportunity for... sports, band, dance, choir etc.  Opportunity to have parental monitoring such as... family time, one on one time with parents, education,  etc.  But for me, my criteria is an opportunity to receive love from a married mother and father.
When you start to burden others
You need to be able to take care of their basic medical, dental, and social needs.  When you use Government help to bring these children into this world on a continual basis, then you most likely need to stop.  
When your sanity is at risk
If by reason alone that your sanity is at risk with only one kid, then you are either way too busy being busy, or are extremely self centered.  Get on an exercise regiment to release the stress or get on medication.  In essence, get over yourself!  A wise man once said "Forget yourself and go to work".  Maybe you should have served a mission! (Remember, if your starting to become offended here, read the subtitle of this blog)
When you are putting your health at risk.  
Too many C-sections can become dangerous, talk to your doctor, adoption is a great option.
When you can't manage your life because you become overwhelmed.
Now, if that entails too many soccer, gymnastic, football, baseball practices etc., then cut back on how many activities they do, and add more family time.  But if the kids are only doing one thing and your going bald from trichotillomania secondary to frustration, then Dr. Vas or Tubal are calling.
And finally, when a maxi van (12 passenger) cannot legally fit any more kids.
I guess you can get a bus, or just stop already!
Add or subtract ideas at your will.  

Monday, May 4, 2009

The Human Shield, I married a superhero

If it weren't for being a full time mom, Debbie would probably be a body guard or something in the realms of superhero work.  I have two stories to back it up.  Just tonight as our littlest one was sporting a good solid fever, his body decides to rid itself of all gastric contents.  As Debbie is the wonder woman of cuddling her sick baby, she received the full onslaught to the chest.  Quick as a bolt of lightening, she used the blanket, her hand, and her shirt as the recipient of the barrage.  Not one drop of atrocious smelling slime hit the carpet or surrounding structures.  Yeah, pretty amazing.  
So, even more amazing was a similar situation several months ago with our little princess.  It was church time.  We all arrived with our not so up-to-par family and sat in the token back row seat (less distraction for the rest of the members when Chase runs around waving to everyone). We sat on the bench near an exit in case we needed a quick escape to start the beatings for irreverence ( I'm joking here...okay, when am I ever really serious?).  While Emma was resting her head on Debbie's lap, regurgitated breakfast came up and out like a curdled milk fountain.  Amazingly enough, there was minimal collateral damage.  I don't quite know how she did it, but covered from chest to bottom of skirt, Debbie was a putrid mess.  Incognito, we whisked Emma away and into the bathroom for clean up.  Virtually unscathed, I came back out to a battle brazened yet smiling wife.  How does she do it?  After I tucked Emma in the car and sent them home, I returned to clean up the mess with chemicals found in the janitor's closet.  Since the clean up was minimal, no one in the congregation noticed any part of the ordeal.  No one even knew Emma was sick.  Yeah, Debbie is that sneaky.  
Okay so Deb had to remind me, I forgot to mention the original story.  We were getting ready for my medical school graduation.  We were eating breakfast with the family at the hotel.  Brock had just eaten a good size meal.  This was unusual because usually he is the pickiest eater known to man.  So, after he downed some cranberry juice, orange juice, yogurt, and some toast, Debbie points out that he hadn't been feeling very well last night or this morning.  We were thinking he was on the mend due to his voracious appetite.  Well, apparently his mind was willing but his intestinal fortitude was not.  And yup.  KA-BOOM, mama was covered from head to foot, literally.  Her green bag, sandals, skirt, sweater, and hair.  And yes, minimal amounts hit the floor.  It must ingrained into her DNA somehow.  
So I need some help here.  I'm trying to come up with her superhero name for Mothers day, and have run into a snag.  I can't decide between two names.  I'll take a poll, and you can comment.  
1. The Human Shield
2. The Barf Magnet Extraordinaire
Kudo's to all you loving mothers out there.  I'll wipe bottoms and change diapers with the best of em, but it would freak out if I were the one to receive the brunt of the vomit.    
 

Friday, May 1, 2009

If you watch TV...

Then congratulation, you like me, are being shaped by our world.  What you spend your time doing, reading, watching,  you become.  Desensitization comes by being fed the same stuff over and over again until you rationalize it in your head as not being all that bad.  Then you find others that feel the same way (they watch the same crap) and you start taking comfort because you're now "joining the crowd".  If you don't keep building up on your moral values then it's like getting around in a hover-round instead of walking.   You end up fat.  
You see, after my two year mission to Honduras, where all I did was eat, breath, teach, gospel principles, coming back to the states and re-integrating myself was like jumping into the arctic waters naked.  Walking down the hallway's at former UVSC where mostly naked women were dancing on every TV to RB music almost landed me in the Bishops office.  Then I saw that no one else was fazed by this.  After a few weeks to months, it didn't bother me as much.  Wow, how fast and easy it is to slide down the moral fire man's pole!  
Then there was the Show 24.  One of my favorites by far.  Well, after season four I decided that enough violence was enough.  I felt angry and sick after each violent episode.  Then I thought, oh, Hero's would be a good show.  How cool is that to have a quasi X-men take on modern day practical individuals?!  Then after a few episodes it grew very dark, and the villian was more vile than ever by cutting or breaking into innocent people's skulls to steal their power.  Yeah, sick.  Then, after we have finally found Biggest Loser, and American Idol (not without it's ill of making fun of those with a mental illness), I thought TV was better.  That was till one night after AI, a show popped on at 8:00pm.  The initial scene was a woman sitting in a chair.  Her co-worker comes in, they exchange hello's, then he graphically riddles her with bullets with a machine gun.  I was stunned beyond words.  A few more minutes into the show I realize it was the guy's nightmare/dream.  Yeah, like a 4 year old could have differentiated that!  Good thing 5 minutes earlier I sent Brock to bed.  I could go on and on here.  
Basic's are, that sex and violence sell.  Now that everyone is using that to get their show on television and not to be outdone, more sex and more violence are being prescribed to viewers.  Show's demeaning the sacredness of intimacy such as Sex and the City, or Lipstick jungle are atrocious excuses of despicable soap opera's.  TV has for the majority, become a terrible thing.
Don't get me wrong, just like any invention such as planes, rockets, cell phones, etc.  They were all developed for the good and progress of mankind.  This is so for programs (oh how I wish I had more than local channels) like the Discovery channel or Disney etc.  Every invention has been used for evil as well.  Planes deliver bombs, rockets kill and can deliver massive death, cell phones are used in bomb ignitions.  So, I suggest using your TV for good and use your moral values as a gauge of what should be brought into your home.  You are shaped by that which you educate yourself.  Your children hear, see, and learn more than you think they do, whether it came from the "Boob Tube" or your regurgitation by word or attitude.  Molly Mormons and Peter Priesthoods make good parents.

Stop the madness, Stop the Benadryl

You got it, I'm riled again.  I've seen countless advertisements on Benadryl (diphenhydramine) now.  One of the oldest and dirtiest antihistamine medications out there.  It's like using Aspirin for all aches and pains.  Yeah, useful, but too much and you cant stop oozing from a little cut.  
Well, if tylenol, ibuprofen, aspirin came out on the market today as prescription drugs, you would see them pulled off the market the next day for litigious fears.  Too much Tylenol, you fry your liver and sometimes its irreversible leading to ...yeah, death.  Too much Ibuprofen, and you fry your kidneys.  Even if you don't take in enough water after a race and take it.  It can send you into acute renal (kidney) failure.  
So, what about Benadryl?  Death is not really an option, but turning you or your kids into an actor in "Dawn of the Dead", is not a probability, it's more of an actuality.  You see, there was a study that came out about 2 years ago comparing driving skills of those on normal Benadryl dosage and those just at the legally drunk blood alcohol levels.  Guess who did worse?  Nope, not those intoxicated with alcohol.  That is why I called it a dirty drug.  Not only is it a class ? antihistamine, but it has central nervous system side effects.  It slows down brain function and it does this longer (about 36 hours) than the antihistamine side of the drug works.  They even put the stuff in Tylenol PM and Advil PM.  You can sleep well, then be a numb brain at work all the next day.  Makes me feel comfortable driving to work every day, doesn't it you?  
Now armed with this information, who of you would like to send your kid to school with a slow brain without the buzz?  Well, I'm sure you don't want your kid with an alcohol buzz either, but, I'm sure your asking now about other options.  And in our God blessed country of a free market society, at least still for a little while, we have many wonderful antihistamine medications developed and now out on the market, even over the counter!  No, we wouldn't have such medications if B. Obama gets his way with socialized medicine.  (see my post on socialized medicine)   Claritin and Zyrtec are the latest and greatest over the counter medications out there.  Ask your friendly doctor on dosage, but where safety is concerned, they are much better options.  Unless of course you like your kids to reenact your favorite horror movies during the allergy seasons.